Of Persistence and Indifference

I work out usually at The Fort in weekends and lately I've been seeing there a former date, too. I don't know how he got my number but he's been texting me lately and last night I wanted to be mean to him in text. He wanted to go out with me again. I said I was busy and he said his sister has some bazaar stall with knickknacks that I could be interested in and I said no thanks. And he replied, how about tonight? Jesus, dating again someone who you used to date but didn't work out is so not fashionable in my book. It makes me want to puke when I think about it. Bile accumulating in my stomach and trying to escape through my mouth.

People say I'm too nice for my own good sometimes. Or maybe too generous. But I have this defense mechanism going on, too. When I feel like I've been so nice to someone and that person bad-mouthed me or was just nasty and mean to me, I will just stop seeing that person/friend/date. I don't think I'm obliged to understand everyone's issues. It's easier for me to just stay out of that person's way forever.

The former date and I used to fight. Well he got mad a lot at me. I would pick him up from his house, drive him to wherever he wants to go and pay for everything along the way. That's fine with me but he would start fights because we would for example arrive at the gym of his choice 5 minutes late because of heavy traffic. I would pay phone credits, too, and he doesn't reply to any of my text messages. He would say, "What I do with those credits, whom I text, is none of your business." He didn't want to go to Greenbelt with me because his friends might see us together and he didn't want them to know we were going out. Later I found out he was dating someone else, too. This 40 something guy.

So after I stopped seeing him, I started dating someone. The former date kept on calling me and one time my current date answered the phone and they had a fight. They were both screaming and I thought they were being ridiculous. I mean, life's easy. Just--disappear. I mean come on, there's 7 billion people in this planet.